when someone say hi to ya bae for too long
and then she does that shit for another 45 fucking minutes and its annoying as hell cuz yall aint never on time for nothing cuz her fuckass cant never make up her mind.
"i was born in the wrong generation" i say as i steal my grandkids hoverboards because fuck you i was promised these years ago
im pretty sure bromance is the perfect example of how embarrassingly fragile masculinity is. you know what a female bromance is called? a friendship
the fact that there have no leaked nudes in my dashboard proves that i’m following the right people
i changed my okcupid profile to say “you should message me if you know any good jokes about giraffes” and someone responded “you, a baby, and a giraffe walked into a bar, and then you walked out with me! ;) ;)” and i’m so angry because that doesn’t even make sense, there is ZERO adherence to structural joke norms, why the fuck is the baby there? did we leave the baby at the bar? jesus christ, did we fucking leave the baby with the fucking giraffe, that is NOT RESPONSIBLE
Guards: Oh no. Wait. Stop. No. Don’t steal those. Get back here, you criminal. (Pfft! Can’t believe they’re falling for it!)
I read that in a sarcastic voice
why is this so funny?
Today in biology the teacher asked “why do chromosomes have to stick together?” And I whispered “because they’re bromosomes” and the guy next to me just about died laughing
BUT HE HAD 7 KIDS AND A WIFE TO FEED SO HE ENDED UP OWNING A GROCERY STORE AFTER SERVING IN WW2
TODAY MY DAD WAS CLEANING THE HOUSE AND FOUND SOME PENCIL DRAWINGS THAT MY GRANDPA DID AND ASKED IF I WANTED TO HAVE THEM AND I
CAN WE JUST LOOK AT THIS
MY BAD WEBCAM PICTURES DON’T EVEN DO THEM JUSTICE LIKE LOOK AT THESE
MY GRANDPA NEVER BECAME A FAMOUS ARTIST
BUT I WANT TO MAKE HIM KNOWN
Do NOT shame people for choosing not to go to school.
Do NOT insult people for dropping out.
Do NOT teach your children that dropping out means you are a failure.
You never know what’s going on in that person’s life.
Just DON’T DO IT.